A LETTER TO ME FROM ME
10th October 2012
I hope this letter finds you well. I'll start by introducing myself. I am Wayne Brown from the future. I know this will be hard for you to comprehend as it is 1982 where you are, and being only 15 years old there are many things that you believe you know and understand but unfortunately there are many things you have yet to learn about and experience, just as there are still many things for me to learn about and experience.
You currently stand as a young teen on the cusp of approaching adulthood, your life spread before you like a massive network of paths and possibilities. I would like to tell you that you have an easy life in front of you, a life rich with love, enjoyment, achievement, satisfaction and abundance but unfortunately I know the the path that we will take to get to the position where I am now. The path is littered with decisions that we will make based on ignorance, naiveté and sometimes just plain stupidity. We will stumble, and hurt ourselves more than a few times. We will leave broken relationships behind us, missed opportunities, and wasted possibilities. It hasn't all been a waste of time though. We have learnt much and met some great people who have really opened our eyes. Where I am now is a pretty cool place, once again with a future of paths and possibilities.
It has only happened because I opened myself up to you back then, and asked you where we were going to go. You told me and I decided to get control back of our lives and start to live from our heart. It has not been easy and is at times down right scary, but I can feel our confidence growing and the fear start to shrink.
I know that at the moment, you don't feel confident or worthy. I know that there will be dark times and despondence that overwhelms you. There will be wrong decisions, there will be decisions based more on what others supposedly want for you and other decisions that have no real basis other than some story you will buy into.
I can't tell you what to do, or how to avoid some of the mistakes, because I can't. No matter how informed I make you, you are going to stuff up. That is the nature of life, for it is through mistakes that we learn. All I can offer as advice is, to learn about the following things and become conversant, confident and knowledgable. Don't leave things to chance.
Learn about yourself, your dreams, your aspirations, the things that make your heart sing. These are the things that will carry you through the dark times. Learn what you believe about yourself and if it doesn't lift you up or make you desire to be better that you are now, question it, alter it to be what you need and commit it to memory. You only have one life, don't waste it be playing down your magnificence. You have amazing gifts as we all do, and the world would suffer if it never got to see your gifts. Be all you can be and believe it in every cell of your body. Watch your thoughts for they become your feelings, which will become your words, which will become your actions and your actions will become your destiny. Be wary of what you let into your mind.
Learn to be a good partner. Learn how to love well. Learn what good love is and never settle for less. You have an abundance of love to give someone and don't waste it on people who will not reciprocate. Learn to have a brave heart who is willing to risk, but do not be reckless with your heart for it may be able to absorb blows but it will bruise and the bruising takes some time to go away. Keep in touch with your emotions, do not shut them away for they will help you stay connected to yourself and your partner. Lift your partner as much as they lift you and remember that an argument that is about something that is not really important is an argument not worth having. You will quickly learn that an argument that goes for more than 30 minutes is about something far deeper than the subject mentioned and needs something far more effective than an argument. Learn to love well and be loved well. Pick well with your partners and you will have joy, pick poorly and you will have many years of anguish and pain. Years wasted with arguments and anger. Pick well, ask the right questions.
Find a career that gives you joy. Work toward that career, even if you have to fill some time doing something else to build money or skills to do that job. Make sure it is something that makes you want to jump out of bed in the morning for the excitement it creates in you and let no-one sway you from that path. If they try to convince you that you'll fail or aren't capable, find someone who will encourage you until you decide and only you, that you aren't suited to it. Finding joy, satisfaction and fulfilment in your job in paramount to your life. Never settle for less.
Learn how money works. Learn how to budget, save, invest and earn your money. There are some who say that money is not important, but you can make more change in the world with money than you can without. Learn about money. We all deserve wealth, not just on money, but relationships, health, career, friendships, spirituality and so on, but if you are broke, all of these areas suffer. Learn about money. Do not squander your earned dollars for they will enable you to do the good in this world that you want to do. Learn about money. Learn how to make your money earn money for you and not you earn the money. Learn to be comfortable with it, use it wisely and make it grow.
Learn to keep your health. You are currently healthy and will remain that way for most of your years, but do not take it for granted. Do not start smoking. It is a stupid habit and you will not enjoy coughing up crap or being told in your mid 20's that you have the start of emphysema. Keep up mild exercise. You will keep pretty good fitness but maintain suppleness and look after your back. You don't know it at the moment but you will find out you have an extra vertebrae which will cause you to have bad back pain. Look after your back. You want to reach a healthy old age. We will all pay for the choices we make to put our health down on the list. Choose well in regard to your nutrition, health and exercise. Definitely do not take health for granted. If you don't look after your body, where are you going to live?
When you get to having children, sit down and discuss it, ask the right questions, have them for the right reasons. Make sure you're ready because being a parent is a big job, you can't do it half baked. If you get this wrong, then your children will think that is how you do it and they will get it wrong. Be a good partner as well as a good parent as the two complement each other. Learn the rules of parenting and apply them diligently in the early years for the early work will pay off. To get you started, should you choose to become a parent, remember these two rules; One; If it's 'no' today, it's 'no' tomorrow. Do not waver on this one. Regardless of whinging and pleading, stand firm. They will learn that 'no' is 'no' and nothing will change that. It will save you all grief down the track. 'No' is 'no', and 'yes' is 'yes' and never the twain shall change. Two; Find the point where you lose it, draw a line there and long before you are pushed to that point, get them to stop pushing. If you lose your cool, the child has won the battle and you all ultimately lose. Keep control of your emotions with kids. They need to feel safe and you need to feel calm, loving and in control. This will be your hardest job, if you choose this,it can give you the highest of highs and the lowest of lows, but can bring great joy and satisfaction if done well. Learn to be a good parent and raise good children.
Finally, try your best to keep all of these things in your life with a healthy balance. It will test you, keeping that balance, but be diligent, regularly assess where you stand in your journey and how you are progressing. Keep track of the journey so you can see your progress. The journey forward is easier to control if you can see where you've been. All the best things in life are the ones you have to work for. They are worth working for and so are you.
A few thoughts to help ease your journey. Remember that when people cause you pain and anguish, it is not really about you but about them. They have pain and anguish they are trying to ease and unfortunately you are collateral damage. To get really upset, ponder revenge or try to figure out why they did it will only lose you sleep. Try to let that go as one of those things that you'll never figure out, for even asking them will not yield the truth as they aren't even aware what that truth is.
The only thing you can control is you. The only thing you have any real and lasting influence over is you, so work on you. Get control of you, your thoughts, your beliefs, your actions, for controlling these you will have a semblance of control over your life.
Your first love will break your heart in a few years. It will hurt, but you will heal. Friends will leave you to seek their path. You will change jobs seeking to find you and what makes your heart sing. Do not be afraid of change, for life is change, and you adapt well. Never doubt your instinct, it will always speak true to you. You know more than you think you do, believe in yourself.
You can have a relatively smooth journey with minimal bumps and bruising but stay aware, ask regular, well thought out questions to get well thought out answers. Stay true to your heart and remember that you only have the current moment. The past is already gone, the future has yet to arrive and worrying about either will alter nothing. Be gentle with yourself, strive for everything and try to make your corner of the world as good as possible. You cannot fail in all of this. The worst that can happen is you fall short, but if you aim for the stars, you'll at least hit the moon.
I leave you with all this information to ponder. If it gets too much, call out for me and I will be there in your heart to hear you and help you, the same as you are in my heart for me to hear and ask for help. We are destined for greatness and abundance and we should expect and strive for nothing less, for the more we have, the more we can give. Live your life well and I will meet you somewhere on the path. Until I can hold you, know that you are at least loved by us.
Wayne Brown is a facilitator and promoter for life change. Contact him at
or listen to his podcasts at www.the7bigquestions.podomatic.com