WHAT MOVIE ARE YOU WATCHING?

It's a funny thing that we all love going to the movies and we lose ourselves in the drama, the tension, the action, the suspense, the violence, the humour, the plot, the effects, the whole package. We'll happily spend our hard earned money to lose ourselves for a short period of time in the efforts of people who do this for a living.

We know that the action is set up, we know the violence is faked, we know the effects are computer generated or very carefully constructed, we know the scenery is fake, we know the characters are invented but we still buy into it and believe it is real, even if only for a couple of hours.

A perfect example was many years ago, I was at the cinemas watching Rocky III. For those of you that may be too young, it starred Sylvester Stallone as Rocky and Mr T as Clubber Lang. There was this scene where they are boxing and Rocky as per usual was in the corner getting the snot beaten out of him. The tension had been built up as the punches flew back and forth until Rocky was protecting himself as well as he could as the punches rained on him. It wasn't looking good. Suddenly, this woman over to my left, jumps to her feet and screamed out “Get out of there Rocky!” I thought to myself, there is someone who has really bought into it. It's amazing I still remember that so clearly.

See, she was buying into it 100%. Her conviction that Rocky was real and in imminent danger was complete. She had value for money. We have all had that experience, where we buy into it 100%.

Your life is just like a movie. There are scenes played out with backdrops and scenery and set pieces. We have a cast, who are actually writing their own script. We have action, drama, tension, suspense, intrigue, romance, even some violence. We play it out every day on this world stage. We control all of the action, whether we like it, believe it, or even understand it. Unfortunately, some of us don't like our movie.

My question for you is this. What movie are you creating? What value for your money have you created? Who are the cast? What genre of film are you directing? How will each scene end? Are you creating the actual film you want or are you picking an action film when you really want a thriller? Are you creating a suspense film when you really want a romance?

Whether we believe it or not, we are the movie makers of our lives. Every scene is set up by us, cast by us, directed by us, edited by us, scored by us, we do the whole package. We a one (wo)man film making machine.

If you don't like your film, start again. Learn to direct the film you do want, write the script you want, hire the actors and actresses you want, set up the scenery you want. Be the film maker you want to be, take control. You've paid the money (you're living), you may as well see the film you want to see (live the life you want). So, what is your film going to look like now?

Wayne Brown is a facilitator and promoter for life change. Contact him at

the7bigquestions@yahoo.com or www.the7bigquestions.com

or listen to his podcasts at www.the7bigquestions.podomatic.com

WHICH ONE WILL YOU CHOOSE?

Yesterday I was down picking up a few things from in town, and was talking to a lady down there. She thanked me for being patient as I waited for service and the subject of people who complain about service came up. I said 'If the worst thing you've got to complain about is the service you are or aren't getting, you're doing really well.' This lady agreed with me. It's true though.

Life throws us some really tough curve balls, and we can buy into all the rubbish that comes along with it, we can let our emotions control our actions, we can attract more negative stuff by focussing on the 'negative' stuff or we can remember that we still have so much that is going right in our lives.

For instance, from the following list, how many things could you tick the box as being in your life;

☐   I am alive and experiencing life.

☐   My sense of sight, hearing, touch, smell and taste works.

☐   My heart is healthy and functioning.

☐   I live in a great country with freedom of speech and movement.

☐   I have friends and family that care about me.

☐   I am able to move around easily as my body functions properly.

☐   I have creativity, imagination and intelligence.

☐   I am fed, clothed, sheltered and have access to fresh water.

☐   I am suffering no major illnesses or health challenges.

☐   I have opportunities to make my life better if I look for them.

☐   I have access to educational resources.

☐   I have employment and I have disposable income.

☐   I have the ability to change my mind, my thinking and my future.

You get the idea. We have so my things to be grateful for, and we could go on and on listing them. Unfortunately, as humans we are inclined to focus on the negative. The glut of reality shows that vote people off proliferate, so it proves we do that.

The big question is, 'What are you going to focus on?' The negative, which can overpower you, make you feel helpless, drag you to your knees or are you going to focus on the positive and really take off with your new wings and soar higher than you ever have, above the sea of mediocrity to be all you can be and leave the best legacy you can?

As always, the choice is yours, always has been, always will be. Choose well and may we meet on the journey.

Wayne Brown is a facilitator and promoter for life change. Contact him at

the7bigquestions@yahoo.com or www.the7bigquestions.com

or listen to his podcasts at www.the7bigquestions.podomatic.com

THE MOST POWERFUL TOOL YOU'LL EVER USE

A while ago I was re-reading a book series I like to re-read every couple of years. In fact, how I came across it was quite weird. I was on holidays down south with my ex and we had stayed in a B & B, and in the morning I was in the lounge looking at a small library the gent had for clientele to read. We were discussing books we had read and he recommended this book series. It's called 'Conversations with God' and he thought I might find it interesting. I made note of it but didn't give it much thought as I felt it was a religious thing and I'm not religious. On the way home, we stopped off in a country town and were looking in a store when the lady in there said “I've been reading this book series 'Conversations with God' and it's really good”. Anyway, I rolled my eyes upward and silently said “Okay, I'll get it”. I brought the series when we got home and read it. I thoroughly enjoyed it and have gleaned many great bits of wisdom and knowledge from it.

A couple of months ago I re-read it and came across a part that I had forgotten about but this time it jumped out at me and I made a solid note of it and wanted to pass it on here. I believe it is one of the most, if not the most powerful tool you'll ever use. It can majorly change your life. It has already made a massive difference to mine. It is about truth. In the book they describe five levels of truth telling. They are

1. Tell the truth to yourself about yourself
2. Tell the truth to yourself about another
3. Tell the truth about yourself to another
4. Tell the truth about another to that other
5. Tell the truth to everyone about everything

The basic crux is that at level one, you stop using denial and admit to yourself how you really are feeling. I found this is where my life change started. This is the point where I started to take responsibility of my life and control of the direction.

The second level is where I started to get rid of the people that were working against me. I had to admit who was on my side and who wasn't. It was hard to admit that these people probably weren't good for me to hang around.

Level three and four are where I currently am. It is really difficult having to make a stand against people and tell them how I really feel about myself as well as how I feel about them. It is terrifying and scary and also exhilarating as well because I know I'm moving my life forward.

Where do you feel you are? What level are you at? Where would you like to be? What's stopping you?

I heartily encourage you to start using this one tool and see how much it can change your life.

Send me an e-mail and let me know how you're going. Give it a real crack, it's your life we're talking about here, no-one else's. Go for it!

Wayne Brown is a facilitator and promoter for life change. Contact him at

the7bigquestions@yahoo.com or www.the7bigquestions.com

or listen to his podcasts at www.the7bigquestions.podomatic.com

NEW YEAR POTENTIAL

I hope your Christmas and New Year went well. Here we stand on the cusp of a New Year. As we stand together surveying the landscape in front of us, full of possibilities, opportunities and potential, we ask ourselves 'How much of it will I travel over, or will I sit here for quite some time and then wander on just a little bit, like I did last year?'

Every year we have a chance to do it all over again and usually most people don't seize on anything, they keep doing the same thing over and over again. I want to put in here a bit of an e-mail I received some time ago which I believe that if you read regularly would help keep you motivated in your change for a better life.

For many years I worked in palliative care. My patients were those who had gone home to die. Some incredibly special times were shared. I was with them for the last three to twelve weeks of their lives.

People grow a lot when they are faced with their own mortality. I learned never to underestimate someone's capacity for growth. Some changes were phenomenal. Each experienced a variety of emotions, as expected, denial, fear, anger, remorse, more denial and eventually acceptance. Every single patient found their peace before they departed though, every one of them.

When questioned about any regrets they had or anything they would do differently, common themes surfaced again and again. Here are the most common five:

1. I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

This was the most common regret of all. When people realise that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people have had not honoured even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made.

It is very important to try and honour at least some of your dreams along the way. From the moment that you lose your health, it is too late. Health brings a freedom very few realise, until they no longer have it.

2. I wish I didn't work so hard.

This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children's youth and their partner's companionship. Women also spoke of this regret. But as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.

By simplifying your lifestyle and making conscious choices along the way, it is possible to not need the income that you think you do. And by creating more space in your life, you become happier and more open to new opportunities, ones more suited to your new lifestyle.

3. I wish I'd had the courage to express my feelings.

Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.

We cannot control the reactions of others. However, although people may initially react when you change the way you are by speaking honestly, in the end it raises the relationship to a whole new and healthier level. Either that or it releases the unhealthy relationship from your life. Either way, you win.

4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

Often they would not truly realise the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.

It is common for anyone in a busy lifestyle to let friendships slip. But when you are faced with your approaching death, the physical details of life fall away. People do want to get their financial affairs in order if possible. But it is not money or status that holds the true importance for them. They want to get things in order more for the benefit of those they love. Usually though, they are too ill and weary to ever manage this task. It is all comes down to love and relationships in the end. That is all that remains in the final weeks, love and relationships.

5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realise until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called 'comfort' of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content. When deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again.

When you are on your deathbed, what others think of you is a long way from your mind. How wonderful to be able to let go and smile again, long before you are dying.

Life is a choice. It is YOUR life. Choose consciously, choose wisely, choose honestly. Choose happiness.

I know that for myself I have been trying to integrate these rules into my life as well as some that I have developed. It is at times difficult because it moves me out of my comfort zone and away from what others expect of me but I know that the third and fifth theme listed here are becoming more and more present in my life and that is a fantastic feeling, to be able to feel so much happier and freer of the expectations put on me by others.

I encourage you to not only consider these themes in the context of your own life but to look at the impact of The 7 Big Questions on your life as well. It takes time to integrate all of these changes into your life, but it is so worth it. Ask for my free e-book and let me know how you're getting on (I enjoy the dialogues) at the7bigquestions@yahoo.com

Wayne Brown is a facilitator and promoter for life change. Contact him at

the7bigquestions@yahoo.com or www.the7bigquestions.com

or listen to his podcasts at www.the7bigquestions.podomatic.com